Sunday, September 16, 2007


Man, I worry for my future children. No, not because I've suffered some sort of massive blow to the testicles today... the nuts check out, don't worry cats. And not because I suffer from more than my fair share of recessive genes (mostly my crap eyes and genetic condition). But because today I encountered annoying children. The Diner, you see, was graced by the presence of some squealing brats who did not -ruin- my luncheon, but certainly made their presence known. BY SCREAMING EVERY GOD DAMN THING IN THEIR HEAD. And the parents? Totally not in any sort of control. The word of the day was "Shh!", evidently. They sounded for all the world like a leaky sump-pump. A leaky sump-pump which did not have time for its own children.

And I got to share vicariously in Aaron's proctoring experience, wherein one High School Junior asked him what a multiple was. Boy did not know what a multiple was. I mean... how? How do you not know? I don't even know how to word a response to that! "A multiple is a number what has been multiplied"? WHAT IF HE STILL DOESN'T KNOW?! WAH!

My point? Children are capable of being amazingly dumb and annoying, and days like today I do not trust my (hopefully acceptable) parentage to rectify this fact.

... which is the third of six reasons I'm glad I haven't impregnated anyone as far as I know.


Anonymous That Girl You Knocked Up In High School said...

...we should talk.

9/17/2007 5:27 AM  
Blogger Paul said...


It's your only escape.

9/17/2007 10:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You as child went to many fancy restaurants ,people were amazed - by what you ordered - calamari, at 8 months - and how you behaved, always pleasant.
What happened was a parent thing. Those kids need more than shh - don't let that stop you from having kids -

This weekend at nanas might do it -
all the kids will be at her dinner.

- Seeing all the cousins - a new kind of birth control.


9/17/2007 9:00 PM  

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