Grrr!

Gar. Turns out I'm not going to be in an Iona Player's production in this, my last year at the school. And I'd be okay with that, if it were a matter of there not being a part suitable for me, or my schedule not allowing for it, or me being pissed at the Player's administration or not likeing the play or anything like that. But, no, I didn't get the part because... well, because they wanted to give the part to a super-senior who'd never been in the Players and they thought he should have a chance, and besides, I'd been the star so many times before, and wasn't I going to be in the Speech Department's play anyway? (Answer: good GOD, no!)

And that upsets me. That upsets me in a truly visceral way that "We gave him the part because he's better than you" wouldn't. I don't think I'm a diva, and I wouldn't begrudge not being in because someone else is more deserving, and hell, maybe that was just a really poor attempt to save my feelings and the fact is he IS better than me. But the part should go to whomever is best for it, and not whomever the director is taking pity on. I don't know... last semester, I played a character who was in only two scenes of a twenty-scene play, but I didn't mind, because the part fit my style and schedule (even though last year I was the STAR of the musical), so I got a tiny part for a good reason. This semester... not so much. Driven out for bad reasons.

Sigh. I'm sure this all sounds more harpy-ish than I intend it to... but right now, I am feeling pretty pissy.