(O_o)

I don’t like emoticons, or 'smilies' as they're called... by idiots. I find them irritatingly overused, and more often than not unnecessary. If you can't make yourself understood without mangling punctuation, then odds are you have nothing worth saying and should probably just shut up. They're also representative of the Internet-based trend of bastardizing the Queen's English to the point of sheer unrecognizability. Linguistic laziness in the same vein that makes the letter 'u' into a pronoun, 'a/s/l' into a greeting, and 'ROTFLMFAO' into 'Hmm, yes, that was a mildly amusing bon mot there, sir. Good show.' I'm also displeased with the way these emoticons are thrown together in increasingly unlikely combinations that look less and less like sideways faces and more and more like a fifties comic strip character just hit his thumb with a hammer. I mentioned this once, in the before time, in the long, long ago. All this being said; I have a terrible secret to reveal. I absolutely love this guy: (O_o) Look at him! He’s so charmingly bewildered! Or possibly on the verge of a breakdown... regardless, he's great. One of the many 'Anime' or 'Japanese smilies' which cynic's intuition tells me have never been used by anyone in Japan. Actually, I think all of the, er, Japilies are more adorable than their Western counterparts. Or maybe their comparative rarity just means seeing them infuriates my delicate sensibilities a little less. Or maybe I'm just sick of having to tilt my head to the left so often, and figure every one of these is another day I don't end up at the chiropractor with my face turned upside down, screaming in pain. I don't know, so many choices! I'm bewildered! There's only one rational way to convey my bewilderment: by having said it in the previous sentence! Trust me, you won't catch me using emoticons, occidental or otherwise. I'll convey my emotions like a human being, thank you. It's just that he's so cute! (O_o) I shall name him... Gene. Hooray!