That was... anticlimactic.

So, today was my last day of classes this semester. I have the advertising project and three finals left, and then... the long, long summer. Not that I won't enjoy the summer, the time off of school, and all that, but... um... I'm not going to enjoy the summer, the time off of school, and any of that. Well, that's not entirely true, of course, but it isn't going to be as fabulous and amazing and, ahem, wonderful as I had been anticipating, so I'm not really all that excited to leave. Not that I exactly want to stay here, either. I have no idea what I want, actually, and whenever I try to think about it, I just get bogged down in what I think I should want, until such a point as I have no idea what I'm thinking about anymore. I've seriously got to stop caring so much about what other people think (or what I think they should be thinking, or what they insist they aren't thinking but I am afraid they are, or so on, or so forth), it's not good for me. Seriously; I spent half the day choking with guilt, basically over absolutely nothing, because I started freaking out over what somebody thought of me, and turned into this hyper-self-critical monster that I thought (hoped) had died weeks ago. And I still can't let it go completely! What the hell is up with me?

(I should point out, though, that I'm still way better than I was in the midst of that emo period. I'm not depressed, I'm just... out of it. So, I'll try to get back into it. Wish me luck.)